The Wilcoxsons: May 2010

How do you know when someone doesn't like your kid's name? I'll tell you how, now that I'm the expert on the subject. Dislike of a name can be manifest in many ways. Nonverbal disapproval usually comes in the form of a look, a wrinkling of the nose, the raise of an eyebrow, the absence of eye contact, the stutter or stammer followed by a compliment on the child's looks, outfit, blankie, etc. Those who venture to comment on the questionable name in question usually say something like:

"Oh! Uh... is that a family name?" (What other excuse could there be?)
"Now... where did you come up with that name?"
"Well that's... (insert favorite euphemism here, eg. unique/unusual/different/interesting, etc.)"
"That sounds like a name westerners would pick." (Whatever that means! I shouldn't jump to conclusions--it could be a compliment!)
"Has he/she got a middle name?" "Yes, it's Beauregard/Maude." "Oh good. Then, when he/she grows up, he/she can just go by that rather than his/her first name."
"I just heard a great name for your baby. Let me think... I've forgotten it, but it's the perfect name for your baby!" (Never mind that said baby was born and named a month ago...)

Or, if they're really tactless, yet trying to maintain some semblance of propriety, they'll talk to the victim rather than the victim's parents (which is safer since the babe assumedly can't yet understand any dialect other than baby talk, right?):

"Where did your parents get your name???"
"What were they thinking when they named you _______?"
"Oh well, I love you anyway!"

You're probably wondering why I am an expert on this subject? Well, because there's been about a 50/50 response to Matilda's name. Which means that the 50% who can't bring themselves to say "Oh, what a darling name!" have to figure out something else to say/do. Some of them carry it off quite gracefully and say something ambiguous like, "How sweet!" leaving it to me to determine whether they're talking about the name or the baby. But others are less subtle. And yes, believe it or not, I (or Tilly) have actually been the recipients of all of the above comments and more.

So why did we name our firstborn Matilda Jane of all things? First of all, we happen to rather like the name! Secondly, in terms of popularity, it's currently ranked #829 in the U.S.-- right where I like it! You've heard it, so it's not made-up. Yet you probably don't know anybody else who's got it! The nicknames aren't too obnoxious. In fact, we think they're quite cute: Tilda, Tildy, Tilly, Milly (in our case, not Mattie. There are already plenty of those.) I especially like the meaning: "Its source is maht hild, an ancient Germanic name meaning mighty in battle." I'm not a stickler when it comes to names needing to have some profound meaning, but in this case, I think the meaning is pretty profound. And I have a feeling that she will be a mighty little force to be reckoned with in this world--at least, I hope so.

So, if you don't like my baby's name, that's okay. I don't mind. Chances are I don't like your baby's either. The world is full of different people with different likes and dislikes, and that's what makes life fun! And I try to follow Miss Manners' advice and choose to "believe that everyone means well, and that if anyone seems to be doing something wrong, it is probably not from intent, but from forgetfulness, busyness, absence of mind, or illness." So people may say what they will. But I dare you to hate the name Matilda for long once you meet this little girl.

Scratch that. I double-dog-dare you!